In case anyone is wondering how I’m doing post-bird trauma, here’s an update– they’re stalking me. At least it FEELS like they’re stalking me. As Emery was waiting for the bus this morning and riding around the driveway on her scooter, I was standing on the front porch, minding my own business. I just happened to look over at my spring wreath, only to see that a bird’s nest is being built IN THE WREATH. ON MY PORCH. RIGHT NEAR THE DOOR. I don’t need to imagine the possibilities of a bird’s nest near the door– I’ve already lived it. And as we know, it was not pretty. Soooooo, as you might imagine, I was not happy to see this. I was actually, um, a little nervous. 

Me: Oh, Em! You will not believe this. Look at the wreath. Do you see that? Birds are building a nest in it!

Emery: (Eyebrows raised. Look of concern for her mother’s mental health and stability.)

Me: Do you think there’s a bird in there? Should I bump the wreath and check?

Emery: (Struggling under the weight of her mother depending on her for safety) 

Emery: (Tentatively) Okay Mom! And if a bird flies out, you can get away on my scooter and I’ll just run.

Me: (Feeling totally embarrassed and glad to have the scooter offer.) Okay. Sounds good.

Then the bus came. So none of it actually came to pass. I think I’ll go out there with a broom right now and maybe the Mets apron. Thank God she left the scooter near by.